The Marketing Dance: Doing The Jerk

David Greenberg shares monthly tips from his experience as Director of Marketing for Ted Kurland Associates, a boutique booking and management agency where Berklee interns gain insight into a successful career in music and business.

Selling me crap in an email is justified, because I can label you junk and, hopefully depending on the reliability of my MacMail, never see you again. On TeeVee, that’s a little different as I revel in a good advertisement, having been in that world for a bit back in the ’80s where I was even tapped to look at, and judge, animated commercials for the Cleos. But sell me stuff on Facebook and LinkedIn, man, that’s like tossing a leaflet at my front door and having it end up on my lawn. I then have to throw it out. Is that anyway to get me to buy your stuff? I don’t think you’ll find that in any Dale Carnegie course.

So, why does anyone think they should advertise to me in social media? I’m not talking the soft-sell, like what I do–marketing, imparting information–as opposed to lobbing a sales pitch over the bunker, getting people to check you out and take another step closer to you. “In-bound” marketing as coined by HubSpot. Yes, there’s a potential world of goobers online who may possibly want to buy your–insert your “Obama in 2012” and/or “Not Obama in 2012” tstochke or some other equally appealing item here. Or even how could you think someone would hire you with your plea to be considered hitting them at point-blank range? Especially if you inbox said someone, like me, who you have not even asked if TKA has any jobs open! And, if we do, check the website.

LinkedIn bills itself as the “Worlds Largest Professional Network.” The key word to note is “Professional.” Then “Network.” Building up your network to get connections and discuss professional concerns and the like, in a professional manner. Recently I was LinkedIn by someone who runs a wedding business in Aruba. I thought, hmmm, cool, perhaps she wants to work with my brother — a professional photographer who does high level events in New York. I recently posted on LinkedIn a page I set up for his new scheme of creating panorama pictures to promote venues and events. You can see an test for the Tent at Lincoln Center here and the test for the River Café and a Wolfgang Puck event here.

No, the next missive I got from the woman was not even personalized. It was about having my wedding on an exquisite Aruban beach as the waves dappling the setting sun as we pledge our undying love. One, I’ve been married since 1987, and, two, remember, this is LinkedIn, a “Professional Network.” Even if this was Facebook, I don’t want to be billboarded on my metaphorical front lawn.

Since I am always in the mode of telling people what to do–which comes with the territory of running the intern program here at TKA, and being a dad–I gave her a few social networking pointers.

At the very least give me some information that might make me want to go to Aruba: some recipes for the Sauté they sell out of the white trucks, the coolest out of the way bars to buy Amstel–yes, Amstel with no lite on the label or in the bottle–or how many days since the last little droplet of rain hit the beaches, how to dig your rented VW Gurkel (a dune buggy thang) out of a mound of sand at in the early morning after a beautiful sunrise. (We could have personally benefited from the last one since we are the adventurous lot and found out about the other items on our own.) Personalize your staff; interview them about their fun spots to hang on Aruba, where they buy fried plantains, which is the best truck to buy food from, their favorite wedding. Make yourself a professional with answers. If your network of friends want to know about Aruba, or weddings, they’ll think of you. And if you can get them to think “weddings = Aruba” then you’ve made a convert, possibly a sale.

It’s slow going to be sure, this soft method of selling. If you’re looking for the quick and easy, stay off social media, unless you buy an ad. Or are really into pissing people off.

Next week: Doing The Jerk, two. More moves to get you noticed, but not in a good way. Like doing “The Elaine” in an elevator.

Bio

David Greenberg is Director of Marketing for Ted Kurland Associates, which bills itself as one of the most influential artist booking and management firms in the United States specializing in artists who epitomize excellence in music. (Though don’t send your demos or link your SoundCloud page into his Facebook wall, for he does not have anything to do with the company’s A&R signings, and it shows that you didn’t glean anything out of the article above.) He has spent the better portion of his life trying to refine his method of soft-selling great music to the uninitiated and unwashed with a spoonful of sugar, a method he indeed learned from Miss P, singing from the Sherman Brothers Songbook. Though music is just one byway his career path has taken since those odd jobs and painting houses after college, best read on Facebook or his LinkedIn profile. In addition to everything else in his life, or more importantly, at the center of his life, Greenberg has a wonderful, creative, lively family that endures his bad jokes, sometimes, tells him when his ability to bring home his modus operandi with interns–the fine art of telling people what to do all the time–should be brought down a notch, and keeps him in his place by reminding him the garbage needs to be taken out…now.